I Feel Guilty When I’m Tired

I’ve wanted a family for so long that I only fantasized about the good parts. I didn’t think about the sleepless nights, the super long days, the never-ending crying, or not actually having a minute to yourself.

These are all things I took for granted. Before my son, I loved to sleep. Sleep was my pastime and we were the best of friends. Now, I’m lucky if I get four hours in.

But I feel guilty when I’m tired. I feel guilty when I think, say, act or even breathe the word tired. I feel like I should be grateful to even be put in the situation where I feel like the “walking dead”, but all I feel is guilt.

In my sane mind, I know that I shouldn’t feel this way. But I do. Does that make me insane? Or am I just sleep deprived?

In my head, I feel as if I’ve prayed, pleaded and castrated myself so long that I just take it. But then I ask myself how long before I crack? I want to experience everything with him. I want to be in the moment and I want to create happy moments. But what I mostly need is to realize I’m only human and there’s only so much that I can do.

Am I the only person who has had this issue? Please let me know what you did because it’s really had for me to cope with.

Thank you for reading this. I hope you enjoyed it. Don’t forget to check out my Youtube page to watch my miscarriage journey.

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I love you guys!

-The Unexpected Mommy
xoxo